Fail, fail, fail, fail, succeed


I’m a big, big believer in the power of therapy. Let me state at the outset that this process has had an immeasurably positive impact on my life, so my observations are not abstract – they are born out of experience. 

And yet, like so many life altering experiences that involve the mind, what exactly is happening is not always clear. There is, however, one deceptively simple component that I believe is profoundly powerful. In fact, I think it is the crux that makes the whole thing work.

What I am talking about is this: There are many, many things that we all struggle to process in life, and often these things hold us back from achieving our full potential. These are the secrets that we can’t talk about to anyone – except, if you are lucky enough to have one, your therapist. Just the simple act of opening up and unburdening yourself of whatever perceived shameful experience or thoughts you have can change everything. 

There is something that happens when another human listens to you without judgement. They don’t even have to really say anything for the healing to begin to take place. It’s as if at the moment of your revelation the energy in the room changes your psyche on a molecular level, as if giving voice to your perceived pathology deflates it like a pin popping a balloon.

Suddenly, everything changes.

What once seemed opaque, now seems crystal clear. What once seemed shameful now doesn’t seem like that big a deal.

How does this happen? I have no fucking idea – but I can tell you it works. As a bonus, sometimes you find out you have strengths you didn’t even know you had.

Find this information useful? Don’t thank me, thank your therapist.